Monday, June 8, 2009

Cracker Jacks + Crappy Prize= Crapper Jacks

I'd like to take moment from our regularly scheduled program to rant! How many of you know Cracker Jacks? Now how many of you grew up eating it? Okay good, that's at least half of you. For anyone who doesn't know, Cracker Jacks are a mixture of peanuts and caramel covered popcorn. Yes, it is as tasty as it sounds. What was also special about this snack is that each box was packaged with a little surprise prize. These prizes ranged from small plastic toys, to stickers
and my personal favorite the fake tattoo that you applied with water in a ecstatic attempt to seem cool. Well, what I am about to reveal I realized before, but recently during a lovely picnic, I was suddenly interrupted when I was reminded of the travesty that has become of this wonderful childhood snack. Prepare for the worst..

Warning: What you are about to see may cause symptoms such as anger, sadness, bitterness, fury, depression, and confusion. Do not continue reading if you are pregnant or show signs of pregnancy.

(Here it is folks) (A picture of Zack Effron?)

(Apparently you fold certain parts to see who he grows up to be. My guess...loser)

(Hey when you finish he grows up to be Benjamin Franklin....wow)

(Two of our boxes had this lame prize)

(And look it comes with a bio. This is just what I've always wanted as a child. A lesson of Alexander Hamilton and how he was assassinated)

So this is what we've come to as a nation huh? They take our toys away and replace them with history lessons. Why not just put a Algebra equation in every box? First we lose Jim Henson, then our Saturday morning cartoons begin to suck, and now this!

Rant Over

1 comment:

  1. Actually, Algebra equation sounds good. You know, haven't you ever thought that they're trying to improve national education standards? Hahaha. That sounds terrible. In Korea,we used to have small toys in snacks, too. Now they're almost gone. I think the part of it is because kids are no longer interested in those small toys in snacks. Tv, internet, and videogames... There are so many other things to attract them so they don't care about it anymore anyway. Well, whatever the reason is, it's sad. No more great cartoons, no more great kids movies.. Considering those things, it might be sad to live this time as a kid.

    Well anyway, it's always good to know someone who's not a kid anymore but lives like a kid! Because someone at least remembers the small cool toys and adore them :)

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